a letter - to guys (part 1)

We all know the girls that i am talking about...

they are time bombs and they are ticking

and the only question's when they'll blow up

- Mood Rings, Relient K

To guys,

First off, i don't speak for all women so don't assume that something i write here is law. The point of this letter is to explain that sometimes even girls don't get girls. Second, guys... you are confusing too but that's a topic for another time. Third, this is part one and (because girls are really confusing) i'm anticipating there will be at least a part two coming at you sometime soon.

A few weeks ago, a good guy friend called me at 10:30pm confused and deeply hurt by a girl that he thought he was in a relationship with. As he explained his side of the story i was shocked by how confusing i found her actions but also by the fact that i completely understood where she was coming from even though her actions made no sense. To clarify... i couldn't believe that she would hurt my friend like that, but i understood why it made sense in her head to do that. As i tried to explain her reasoning to my friend, i realized, not for the first time, that girls literally make no sense to guys sometimes. We say one thing, but completely mean another. We explain our side but don't really explain anything at all. Now, girls, before you get all up in arms remember i'm on your side. i'm a girl too. But man, we are terrible sometimes. 

All that to say, i thought i'd write you guys a letter. A letter that can hopefully shed a bit of insight on the female mind. And if all else fails, just listen to the song Mood Rings by Relient K and wallow in the fact that literally no guy understands us (or listen to their album "Forget And Not Slow Down" - rumor has it it's about a girl/breakup). 

Feelings.

Another close guy friend recently went through a break up. One night when we were talking he said "Wow, i really hate the 'F' word." A  little confused about what he meant, i asked him to explain, and what he meant was not the four letter word that originally popped into my head but another one... feelings. 

She broke up with him because she wasn't sure of her feelings. This was something that confused him because his were very clear. But instead of feeling anger towards her for breaking my friend's heart, i felt sympathy. 

Guys - you are generally very logical people. You think things through step by step and once you reach a step, there is another step that makes sense to take (generally speaking). Girls, on the other hand, are generally guided more by feelings. i don't know if you've ever noticed but a guy will more likely start a sentence with "i think" than with "i feel" and girls are the exact opposite. The way that God wired our brains is different and therefore our processing happens differently. 

Sometimes, in order to cause what we believe is the least amount of hurt, we girls will shy away from our feelings, cutting them off completely. When my friend's girl broke up with him because she wasn't sure of her feelings, i don't believe that she doesn't have any for him. Instead i believe the exact opposite - that she has too many feelings for him and doesn't know how to process that. So instead of taking time to figure it out together, she broke it off so that she could have space to dump the confusing feelings and figure them out solo.*

In some cases, girls choose to use our feelings, or lack-thereof, as a mask because we believe that by cutting you guys off, that will allow us space to understand what's going on in our heads. We are over-thinkers so often we overthink our feelings and mess ourselves up. Then we take that out on you poor unsuspecting gentlemen.

Feelings suck. Both for guys and for girls. But that doesn't mean that they can't be good. Guys, sometimes we just need space to figure it out. And, yes, space is scary. But believe me when i say, crazy, girl feelings are much easier to process with space.

 _________________________

*Ladies - i'm not saying it's bad that they broke up, just trying to explain for those poor guys out there where a girl might be coming from)

february inspiration (#9)

 

• i got the chance to see Relient K and Switchfoot on tour together which was basically a dream come true (Sadie Hawkins Dance and khaki pants anyone???) and i've been pumping out a playlist with both bands today
• The Letterfolk insta has me in tears, daily! Check it out!
• Immigration has been an extremely touchy subject recently here in North American. If you're looking for some discussion on it that is Godly and thoughtful, i would highly recommend this Relevant podcast episode
•  "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." - Eleanor Roosevelt
• These single Christian girl memes cracked me up!
• i used a slow cooker for the first time yesterday and this recipe for Chicken Fajitas was awesome!

(see list #8, list #7, list #6, list #5, list #4, list #3, list #2 and list #1)

top 10 Christmas songs

i have a deep, deep love for Christmas music! I absolutely love the classics but my absolute favorites are usually songs that my favorite artists have written themselves or classics with a twist. So here's my list of my top 10 Christmas songs this year (in no particular order)!

1. Oh Light by Gungor - ok, i already talked about this on the blog but it's just SO good i have to share it again! It's an amazing mixture of worship and Christmas music with Gungor's stunning voices! 
2. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas by Golden Youth - i adore Golden Youth and this song is no exception! It's a mixture of the famous Charlie Brown Christmas song and Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. i wish it was socially acceptable to listen to it all year!
3. Still Still Still by Future of Forestry - this is my favorite classic Christmas song and one that not many people have heard! Future of Forestry does an amazing job with it!
4. Light of the World by Lauren Daigle - this was the first song that i heard Lauren sing and it made me a fan after one go-through. Now this one is solidly on repeat because of her powerhouse voice and fantastic lyrics!
5. Into the Silent Night by For King & Country - so sweet and cutesy and a little bit more upbeat than others on the list! These guys basically can't go wrong in my books!
6. I Celebrate the Day by Relient K - an oldie, but such a goodie! Classic Relient K through and through, while showcasing their faith!
7. Emmanuel by Love & The Outcome - a catchy melody, awesome lyrics and killer vocals make this one that i come back to every Christmas season! This duo is fantastic!
8. Winter Snow by Audrey Assad - this song is stunning. The lyrics aside, Audrey is unreal in this! 
9. Kiss Me Babe, It's Christmas Time by Owl City - i love all things Owl City and this cute Christmas tune is a perfect balance to some of the deeper more melody driven songs of the season
10. Hey Moon by Sidewalk Prophets - i've said it here before and i'll say it again - i LOVE me some good piano! And this unique view of Christmas day is awesome!

BONUS! Owl City just nailed it with his latest Christmas single! So cute, honest and catchy :)

local construction

When the second song of Relient K's new album started to play, i was pleasantly surprised. The first song (Bummin') is a classic Relient K rock tune but the second - Local Construction - opens with a carnival-like piano riff. What i really liked, though, and now absolutely love, are the words in the chorus:

Fix the car
Fix the house
Fix the flaws in myself - it's never done

The song as a whole is poking fun at the idea that local construction is never finished - once one road is fixed, another needs to be fixed. But i think that the chorus hits a bit deeper. i absolutely love the line "fix the flaws in myself - it's never done." The idea that we need to continually be working on ourselves to become more like the image of God.


i've been reading "A Year With C.S. Lewis" (because who doesn't love some good Lewis wisdom?!) and i really connected with an excerpt from his book Mere Christianity:

"Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on... But presently he starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different from the house you thought of... You thought you were going to be made into a decent cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself."

i love that picture. It could be seen as discouraging - that we need to have that much work done on us - but i think it's a beautiful display of God's love for us. That He would love us so much that He is putting effort into every single little detail. He loves us so much that He is constantly shaping and molding us into something more beautiful than we can ever imagine.

And one day all this construction will be done - in heaven. We can have full hope and peace as we rest in that.

look on up

Who cares about Valentine's Day when one of your favorite bands releases a new song?! Thought i would share this magic with you all because a) it's Relient K and everyone should love them and b) the song is such a fantastic reminder to take time to enjoy real life instead of a screen life

Look on Up - Relient K