a letter - to andrew

To Andrew,

First of all, i'd like to say that i'm a fan. That kinda sounds creepy, but we've actually met a few times and i think you're great. i'm also a fan because i know that would have taken a lot of courage to share what you shared.

i don't know you very well at all but i wanted to respond to what you said with a comment. This journey you're on has absolutely nothing to do with me, and i totally understand that, but something you wrote begged me to respond from a girl's perspective, even if you never actually end up reading this response.

You didn't write this in your initial response, but in the second post you did; the one answering people's questions about how you were going to go forward as someone who identifies as being gay but also is a Christian. From what i understood, you said that you would be open to a straight marriage but that you felt like a girl would never go for it, that it would be a "nightmare" for her (to quote you directly). Is it crazy to say i've actually considered what it would be like to marry someone who is gay? Nothing ever came of my thoughts but when a good friend revealed his struggles to me about being gay and we talked about his desire for a relationship i ended up walking away from the conversation considering what it would be like to be in a relationship with someone who is gay. i think it would be an amazingly difficult situation and definitely faith challenging, but then aren't all marriages? And ultimately, i also believe it would be an insanely beautiful situation.

No, i'm not asking you to marry me, and i don't know if God has plans for you to be in a "straight" relationship. i guess what i just wanted to say is that if God can work in your heart to bring about that desire for a woman, then He can also allow a change in the heart of a woman for you. It won't be easy, but again, i've never heard that a "regular" marriage is all that easy either. Ultimately, it's two sinners - imperfect but beautifully loved by God - coming together.

And this may sound impossible or unreachable, but just remember: if this is your desire, you don't need to find a thousand, a hundred or even ten girls that wouldn't consider this a "nightmare." Just one. Because when it comes down to it, options are great but a relationship is between two people who are willing to love each other at their best and worst, and challenge one another to seek God every step of the way.

So i'm sorry if this post seems a little weird, it seems weird to me too, but i just wanted to say what was on my heart and hopefully encourage you. i know God has amazing things in store for you and probably some difficult things too, but ultimately He works for the good of His beloved people.

Thanks for reading and thank you for being so open and honest.

From, me

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